I open my eyes and could feel a sharp pain in the back and front of my head, and in the pit of my stomach I felt sick. I sit up and rub my eyes Why was I in my bed? Maybe I walked up stairs? No, not in my state, it must have been Mikey. I get up and walk to the mirror across from me and look into it, My eyes were red and awful. I shake my head and walk out of my bedroom into the living room Mikey glares at me as I walk in.
“Thanks Mikey” I say and walk to the kitchen were he follows me.
“What? do you think all that shits good do you?” he says angrily “Do you think its gonna make you happier?”
“Meh” I say and start making myself a coffee.
“That crap is doing you so much harm, when I found you … you were awful you threw up and I swear if I hadn’t been there you would have choked and died” he says now upset, it was obvious to me now that last night had been really bad for him.
“I’m sorry” I say “And thanks for helping me, serious, I appreciate it”
“Please at least ease down” Mikey urges “No more illegal’s”
“I’m sorry yesterday was a bad day for me” I reply.
“I know, but we can deal with it in other ways” He says.
“Okay, I’ll try” I say finishing making my coffee.
“Like with …” Mikey says and tries to drop the subject “Never mind”
“What?” I ask and take a sip of coffee.
“Did you… write anything last night?” Mikey asks.
“Umm maybe” I say “Kinda not with it at the time Mikes, everything is a possibility”
I quickly think of my wrists, I look at Mikey and see his eyes dart to my wrists and back to me.
I try to make it look as casual as anything and rub my sleeves down just to check if anything had happened but Mikey doesn’t see anything casual about it and his eyes dart back to my wrists and I stop myself from moving my sleeves further in case.
He looks back at me.
“So what do you think I wrote?” I ask.
“Just some lyrics, and I have to say they are pretty good” Mikey says and walks into the lounge room, where I join him.
He passes me a piece of paper. I read it.
You're not in this alone.
Let me break this awkward silence.
Let me go,
Go on record,
Be the first to say I'm sorry.
And hear me out.
And if you take me down,
Would you lay me out?
And if the world needs something better,
Let's give them one more reason now.
We walk in single file,
We light our rails and punch our time,
Ride escalators colder than a cell.
And in this moment we can't close the lids
On burning eyes.
Our memories blanket us with friends we know,
Like fallout vapour.
Steel corpses stretch out towards an ending sun,
Scorched and black.
It reaches in and tears your flesh apart,
As ice cold hands
Rip into your heart.
That's if you've still got one that's left
Inside that cave you call a chest.
And after seeing what we saw,
Can we still reclaim our innocence?
And if the world needs something better,
Let's give them one more reason now.
“I remember this” I say, “I wrote this when I got home, after talking to you, it just came to me”
“Well I like it” Mikey says.
“I do too” I say “kinda a remedy to all this … shit and chaos”
“Do you think it works?” Mikey asks
“Kinda I guess” I say.
“Oh yeah, Jacquie called last night to check if we were all right” Mikey says and leaves to his bedroom.
I smile and re-read the lyrics.
It would be cool to be a singer of an awesome band. Nan always said I had a creative talent, whether it is writing, art or singing she always said I was good at it.
I walk into my room with the lyrics.
I could imagine it now. Matt as the drummer, Ray as a guitarist, Mikey as the bassist and me … the singer. That would be cool. Yeah, I wonder if we could just try it out a bit.
I put the lyrics on the table and go into Mikey’s room.
“Holy shit get out” He yells at me and quickly I leave the room.
“Dude, tell me when you're gonna get dressed” I say.
“Well I believe its manners TO KNOCK” Mikey states.
“Quite correct, but me? Having manners? After having an idea?” I ask.
“What idea?” Mikey says coming out in a pair of light blue skinny leg jeans and a plain white shirt.
“Well you know how… we like music” I begin.
“Yeah” Mikey says crossing his arms and leaning against the doorway.
“Well, we could … make a band” I finish.
“That’s … different” Mikey says “But who would be in a band with us?”
“Wel,l Ray and Matt” I say.
“Yeah I guess,” Mikey says “But you're calling them, I gotta go out and do some shopping”
“Remember to get some Frankenberry cereal” I say with a smile and go to the phone.
“Dude grow up eat some MAN cereal” Mikey says about to leave.
“Nah, I’m sticking to childhood teeth rotting cereals” I say and pick up the phone.
(Matt’s POV)
“WHAT THE HELL THAT WAS A MOTHER FUCKING TOUCHDOWN” I yell at the football ref on TV.
My phone rings and I turn off the TV, That shit angers the blood.
I answer the phone.
“Yo” I say.
“Hey yo Matt” Gerard says.
“Heya what’s up?” I ask.
“Not much, gonna call work and quit” he replies.
“All cause of a little plane crashing?” I joke around.
“Not fully, I just don’t wanna be a clerk anymore” he says.
“Well what ya gonna do now Mr Way?” I ask.
“Well that’s what I’m gonna ask you” he says, “I was thinking since you know how to play drums maybe umm you, me, Mikey and Ray could start a band?”
“Dude, what whacked out medication have they put you on now?” I ask.
“It’s not that, I just feel maybe we could start a band and well.. help the world in our own way” Gerard says.
“You don’t know how corny that sounded but I’m in” I say.
“Serious?” he asks.
“Seriously serious” I say with a laugh.
“Good I just gotta get Ray’s okay and yeah it goes from there,” Gerard says.
“Awesome, you think he is gonna say yes and ditch his little not-that-good band position of drummer for your, don’t know what you're doing, band?” I ask.
“He is a drummer? IN A BAND?” Gerard replies.
“Yeah, but he isn’t that good, don’t tell him I told ya he isn’t good” I say
“Alright” he says.
“Okays well you better get trying G-man,” I say.
“Okays see ya later” he says.
“Bye” I say and I hang up.
(Ray’s POV)
I try picking up the beat again to a song on the second hand drums a friend gave me, but fail. I throw my drumsticks across the room.
“Why can’t I get it, god damn it” I yell.
My phone rings.
“Okay random” I say and go answer the phone.
“Hello” I say.
“Heya Ray” Gerard says.
“Hey” I say.
“You didn’t tell me you were in a band?” he asks.
“I did, you were probably drunk, or not with it, or daydreaming” I say.
“Make me sound like a great person Ray … Anyways you’re a drummer?” he asks.
“Well not for long I can’t fucken play serious I FUCKEN SUCK I COULDN’T KEEP A FUCKEN BEAT” I begin to yell.
“Dude, dude stop, calm down” he says.
“Sorry Gerard” I say, “Why did you call?”
“Why aren’t you playing guitar? You're awesome at that your talent is going to waste” he says.
“The band I’m in already has two,” I say, “So they needed a drummer and they saw me and thought I would do”
“Well would you rather be a guitarist?” he asks.
“HELL YEAH” I almost yell.
“Well maybe you should join my band?” he asks.
“You have a band?” I ask surprised.
“Well kinda, I’m starting one” he says “So far it’s me, Mikey and Matt”
“I guess I could leave this band” I say, “They could replace me … I think”
“Awesome” he says.
“But what about your job?” I ask.
“I’m quitting, I hate it,” he says.
“Sorry to hear that for the past ever, I told you to leave that sad miserable job” I say.
“I know you were right, you and the rest of the world,” he says.
“Okay Gerard, don’t get all upset dude, wasn’t your fault”
“Thanks Ray, I better call work and tell them I quit,” he says.
“You haven’t told them?” I ask “Weren’t you supposes to go to work today?”
“I couldn’t be bothered going to work, I’m just gonna call them now so I’ll see ya later” he says.
“Dude, your boss is gonna yell so loud” I say but he hangs up.
(Gerard’s POV)
Now to call … my boss who doesn’t know his business is closed still and doesn’t look like opening anytime soon.
I was not looking forward to this AT ALL!
I dial his number.
“Hello” Comes his voice.
“Hi Collin” I say.
“Umm Gerard?” he asks.
“Yeah, umm I have something to tell you,” I say.
“Yes? I’m kinda busy please state what you are trying to say” he says angrily.
“I quit,” I say calmly.
“WHAT?” He yells.
“I don’t wanna work anymore, it’s depressing,” I say.
“Life is depressing, get your ass to work,” he says angrily.
“No, I’m busy doing other things” I say.
“Whatever, you slacker, I’ll get Neil to take over” he says angrily and hangs up.
That wasn’t that bad.
But what to do now? I don’t know exactly what to do.
I know Frank could help me. But he was busy, Damn it.
I yawn God I was still tired so I sit on the couch and fall asleep.
6 hours later…
“Dude wake up, fuck you sleep for ages” Mikey says.
“What the?” I say rubbing my eyes.
“I came back 3 hours ago and you were still sleeping, I mean come on,” he says with a laugh.
“Sorry I was just tired,” I say.
“Did you get Toro and Matt?” he asks.
“Yeah” I say.
“Awesome, I’m guessing you quit work too?” he asks.
“Yep” I say, “Do you think Frank won’t be busy?”
“He would be home about to sip the first of his beer” Mikey says.
“I swear if that’s true I will be scared,” I say.
I pick up the phone and call Frankie.
“… Hello” Frankie says.
“Hiya” I say.
“Hi, thank you for interrupting my beer” he says.
I look at Mikey with a weird look Mikey smiles and leaves the room.
“How are you?” I ask.
“Good” he says “Yourself?”
“Alright” I reply, “I need some help”
“What is it?” he asks.
“Well I’m making a band,” I say.
“Sure you are” Frank says.
“I am, it’s me, Mikey, Ray and Matt,” I say.
“Okay, what do you need help with?” he asks.
“Everything” I say.
He laughs.
“Come over mine, I’ll help ya” he says.
“Want me to bring some lyrics I made?” I ask.
“Sure, I’ll see ya soon” he says.
“Bye” I say and hang up.
“Yo Mikey” I yell to him.
“Yes?” he says entering the room again.
“Are you like psychic or something?” I ask.
“Nah, just special” he says with a laugh “So you going over Frankies'?”
“Yeah, you were listening to my convo … right?” I ask.
“Yeah” he says “Kinda hard not to when you talk so loud”
“I do not,” I say.
“Whatever” he says.
“I’ll be back later” I say and grab the keys and my phone.
I leave the house and drive to Frankies'.
At Frank’s…
I knock on the door.
Frankie opens it.
“Hiya” he says letting me in.
“Hi” I say entering.
He closes the door.
“Beer?” he asks.
“Sure” I say sitting on his couch.
He leaves the room and comes back with two beers he passes me one, I open it and take a swig.
“So what have you come up with so far?” he asks.
“Huh?” I ask.
“Your band?” he asks.
“Not much, pretty much just the band members” I say.
Frankie smiles.
“Not even a name?” he asks.
“Nope” I say, “The name will come … eventually… I hope”
“Okay, so where’s the lyrics?” he asks.
“Here” I say getting up and taking a folded piece of paper out of my back pocket and passing it to him.
He places his beer on the table, unfolds the paper and reads it.
I watch him read it and take another swig of beer.
“Not bad at all” he says surprised “But you need like a chorus”
“Really?” I ask.
“Yeah” he says, “Need help making a chorus?”
“Maybe” I say.
“I’ll get you a pen and paper” he says and leaves the room and returns with a pen and some paper.
“Maybe repeat the chorus two times, once mid way and once at the end and add a bit at the end” He says.
“Yeah I guess,” I say.
“What is the about anyways?” he asks.
“September 11” I say.
“Wow. that’s like quick to write this,” he says.
“Yeah” I say, “I guess”
“Well we need like a filler chorus so, maybe like what happened account thing,” he says.
“Nah” I say “I want it more meaningful, I don’t want it like a report”
“Maybe what the people were doing?” he suggests.
“Actually yeah” I say, “I like it”
I begin writing down a couple of lines and Frankie helps me expand on it.
12pm and 5 beers later…
We had finished the lyrics and were trying to make some more but stopped after we realized we were both … somewhat intoxicated and were beginning to write crap. I had called Mikey and told him I was staying over because I would be unable to drive myself home in my condition and now we were watching TV.
“Oh my god” Frank said.
“What?” I say re-entering the living room.
“Gay sex” he says.
“Really” I say looking at the TV screen.
“Yep” he says.
“Whoa” I say “And we are watching this why?”
“I was looking through the channels” he says and changes the channel.
I smirk at him.
“It’s not as if you have never thought of it” he says.
“True” I reply.
“Really?” he asks.
I sit with him.
“What guy doesn’t think about sex and its kinkiness?” I say.
“So you're gay?” he asks.
“No” I say with a laugh “Chicks are awesome”
“So your bi?” he asks.
I think to myself.
“Well I’m not sure” I reply, “It’s a possibility”
He jumps on my lap and begins kissing me on the lips.
It takes me by surprise and I try to pull away but he doesn’t let me go, in fact he pulls me closer.
He pushes me so I’m lying on the couch and lies on top of me and starts to pash me.
At first I try to get away, but I start to like it and play along.
His hands move from my waist to my back and then to my neck were he curls my hair around his fingers. He stops and pulls up a bit and smiles at me. Part of me was telling me to push him away and catch a cab home and the other part was saying it might be your only chance, try it. Without another thought I wrap my arms around his neck and pull him towards me and pash him back.
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